zippy

Up here it's a combo: Tango tan, scraped hair, hooped earings, crop tops, belly hanging out. And they're on about opening a Hooters up here - who the **** is gonna work in it?!

This cyclist had his own shiny new lane but still chose to ride along outside it on a very busy road, holding everyone up - just because he could. Bollox, he was being a stubborn hippy lovely person, and if he got knocked off then he has himself to blame for not using the new lane he had. PS: I'm off to buy a bike on Thurs for commuting

It's also worth noting that the models with the removable sumpguard were made in the Wolfsburg factory, while the later ones without were made alongside the Arosa when production was moved to Spain.

It was also the first vw engine to make use of Vermiculargraphit in the block casting. They only added it for 600 engines built between 1999 and 2001 to qualify the block for rally use. the strengthened blocks were NDT tested and x-rayed at the factory for defects and should resist bore wear better than the standard softer block. This also assisted these engine to cope with pressures & heat generated when RPM reaches 9800, which is safe to hit when you remove the rev limiter when reprogramming the ECU.

Was that the S2000 or the VX220?

New one: Cyclist commuters who ride in the car lane when they have a new 1m wide cycle lane! I was stuck behind this idiot today going to work. Oh, a previous pet hate cheered me up today - tailgaters. Last week I was tailgated for a couple of miles by an idiot in a Jordan Edition Civic. Today on same stretch of road I see it on the verge with its front smashed in after he ran into someone

Chassis number or any other information worth putting about? Not good

And other shops. I blame Lovejoy.

Been to Newcastle a couple of times but never been able to get tickets for a game til now So it'll be 1st time at St James. Here's hoping it's a good day! We'll be planning the day/nights out over the next few days - we're all 27-32 years old so we'll be avoiding the teenybopper places

But at the time it was the bestest car onthe planet & was faster than a GT3 Now you don't have one you're saying they're no good? :D

Top thread - I'm off to Newcastle next weekend with a heap of mates. As for what to do on a Saturday afternoon... go get match tickets, that's what we've done If I manage to see a nightclub it will be a major acheivement

Funnily enough, one of my mates lives with his Mum & Dad, he's 29 & thinking of buying a Carrera 4 Carrera 4 or being able to walk to the kitchen & eat my breakfast in my pants..? When you weigh up the benefits that way it's a tough choice

I wonder what the overall amount of tax as a percentage that the average person gets deducted from their wages is. I mean soon you get taxed 20% income tax (40% above certain levels) after allowance, then your NI contribution, - on your net pay you have to subtract the other taxes you pay (tax on fuel, car, road tax, VAT on clothes, food, drink, etc, council tax, inheritance tax, etc etc). This is a statistic used in other European countries to see how much they can milk from taxpayers before they hit meltdown. I think Norway was about 65% on average and it's close to where the stat builders believe that it's not worth working. Would we be be around 55% on average? (average salary is around £22k, and average milage is around 12,000 miles, average car will get 35mpg & be £170 road tax, plus council tax on average property, clothing, food, drink, luxuries etc)...

Quote of the day!

Bossjohn, you gonna take that?!!! You better do something about it before you forget

No, please don't! Okay... more stuff that annoys me: Nature programs only show animals humping when you're watching TV at your Mum & Dads house. Sneezing with a cold... you only blow a nose bubble when in public & you have no tissues. Tripping over that invisible lumpy pavement - again, never happens when no-one else can see you. Those people who try to sell cowboy hats & roses in the streets on Saturday nights - go back to playing the Pan Pipes you ratbags. Having big feet & skinny legs, yet no balance. People at airport security. You've seen everyone else remove their belts, watches, wallet, laptop etc, in the queue... why in the name of FECK did you wait til you were at the scanner then hold everyone up?!! Shop assistants who insist on helping you pack, then make each ballhair thin plastic bag hold 10kg of goods, then 'double bag' it. 2x single 5kg bags would be easier you idiot. People in crowds at international rugby games who talk like they know the players personally "come on Johnny.... run Tarquin.... Findlay, knock-on". Sling it. Austin Healey. Crap name, frankenstein hair. Taking a day off work to wait for a delivery & they don't turn up. Makes me want to go on a crime spree. Solicitor lingo. "well designed executive apartment with luxury fittings" = "cramped ex-council bedsit with a couple of B&Q light fittings". Adults that go on & on about how they read lots of books, when all they've read since school is Harry Potter. McDonalds. I could rant all day on this place & its customers. Police Officers on a power trip. I once got a fine for not wearing a seat belt in the back of a car, which is fair enough. But when we can hear someone getting badly beaten up down the road as he's giving me an extended lecture, AND his radio is telling people to go help, he still talks down to me - speaking volumes of our public protectors. Beggars who sit beside cash machines & demand money. You've just talked me out of giving you the small change I had in my pocket by demanding £20. Queuing for lemsip at the chemist, and the pharmacist giving a lecture on hazards of paracetamol, despite her just giving methadone to 4 people. Advice could be better placed you bint. People who insist on using umbrellas when its NOT RAINING! Rhianna, and the people who buy her music. Bono & that albino from Coldplay. "Let's change the world through music" - aye, change YOUR world by selling more albums. Don't see you saying that all the proceeds from one of your albums will go to a charity, do we? People who drive at 40mph in the fast lane, even though their turn off is 5 miles away. Ban them. Speed Cameras vs Cops on road - what is more dangerous... you doing 75mph, or the guy driving 2m behind you when you're doing 68mph? Dogs that try to sniff your groin. People who's sole life ambition is to go to Australia - why spend your whole life saving to go round to the other side of the planet to go somewhere so similar to home but warm? Be a little more adventurous I think that's enough for now. Again, so many things piss me off that I literally could go on all day!

One of my mates has a new S3. 0-60 in under 6s. He loves it. But... Will you be upset when the RSTT comes out... another year to save up the extra £10k needed...

Do the soft drinks industry get taxed on CO2 levels?

Oh where to start!?!?!!! *deeeeeeeeeeeeep breeeeeeeeeeeeath* Cat Piss 'Local' people Farmers in £60k motors who live in 6 bedroom houses but complain about being broke - f.u.c.k. o.f.f. Eating healthily is more expensive Toilets at music festivals Old people who take forever to do anything (was queued for petrol behind a woman who took 10 minutes to get out of her car, 10 to fill the car, 10 to walk to the shop, 10 to walk back, took my whole lunchbreak), feckers, don't drive if you have the reactions of a hibernating snail. People in their 30's who spend ££££'s on car & designer clothes but still live with Mum & Dad. Sell the car, get the bus, get clothes from Next & go feckin rent somewhere. Learn to wipe your own erse! People who post rants like this! Tossers! The fact that beer is fattening. Running, I'm crap at it. Simon Cowell - the devil incarnate. Only here to rob chavs & housewives of their erm.. hard earned cash. He'll kill the music industry like he's killed Saturday night TV. Celebrity apprentice stars strictly dancing on ice in their eyes in the dragons den. Good to see my TV license money is going to good use. Bring back Eldorado. Top gear only being 12 or so shows a year. Quadruple the budget & get it on every week. Mushrooms. They grow on dead things. bloomin' swear filters on forums. The modern terms like "Binge Drinking" & "Gas Guzzlers" - people drank more in the 70's and cars were more polluting! Home insurance - when I let them know my cat had pissed on my laptop & killed it, they told me if I had pissed on the laptop it would have been covered!! Did I mention cat piss? Ordering a steak to be cooked 'medium' & it's just an oozing slab of blood. You don't see raw steak onthe deli counter marked as 'ready to eat', now feck off & put some heat through it - not that I'm going to eat it now I've had to put it back to be spunked on by the lazy lovely person chef who didn't cook it in the first place. Pidgeons. Mushrooms should grow on them. Standing in dogs sh1te. It's always whan you're wearing trainers with chunky grip, and it's always one of those stinking red/orange ones that no amount of grass & sticks will shift. BMW drivers Taking forever to get served at the bar because I don't have breasts. People ordering cocktails at the bar when I only want a pint. Waiting one hour for a pint isn't on. One queue for the poofy cocktails that take forever, one queue for nips & pints Gardening. Garden Centres. Women with prams who just ram into the back of you in crowds - not my fault you were kept awake all night by something that ripped you in half when it appeared. Why the hell are you taking a baby out on a busy Sat afternoon when you have all feckin week to do your shopping when it's quiet?! Teenage girls with prams. They don't look old enough to buy those cigarettes they're smoking! Not being able to fly or have x-ray vision. Being crap at football, one of the loves of my life. How cruel is that?! Expedia. "£179, book now" - "Sorry, the new price for this trip is £3457, click to proceed". Buzzwords at work. I do not want to think outside the box, and I certanly don't want a brainstorming session. Oh, and we don't need as timekeeper - the meeting will finish in 30 mins, so let's just crack-on. I think that's enough for now. I could go on all day here!

We also face the possibility of road tolls on top of it all. Trials to be rolled out over various parts of the country. Strange how you're taxed so much to use a car: Fuel Tax. Road Tax. Congestion Charge. Road Tolls. Where I live, the council are so badly run that they're planning to close almost all public leisure services to save money. Aberdeen City Council will almosty certainly be trying congestion charges & road tolls by 2010, it's a money maker waiting to happen. What the hell do I get for all the income tax, council tax & national insurance I pay? I've not been to the doctors for 4 years as it took 2 weeks to get an appointment. And from the road & fuel tax I get no benefits - the roads are appalling, busy, unmaintained & I lose fillings weekly due to the pot-holes - fillings I can't get replaced because I cant get a bloomin' dentist! (okay, I'm dramatising a bit here). I reckon I should be allowed to not pay any of these taxes. I'll go private for all treatment & I'll empty my own bloomin' bin. Miles cheaper & I'd get better service. I'd pay a heap of gyppo's to tarmac the roads, they'd do it faster then these lazy council lovely persons & wouldn't need to dig it up every 6 months. You don't see gyppo's taking tea breaks every half hour! Rant over. £210 road tax for a Lupo? C'mon, that's taking the piss.

Rather that than 'The Broons', given the recent change in subject

Why stay at home & watch TV when they could star on ITV on weekdays at 9:25am? LMAO @ Lube. "The chancellor today announced that beer up 2p per pint, cigarettes up 24p per pack, petrol up 7p per litre & a 1p per tube surcharge on bum lube"

Man if they get offended by getting teased about being Chave (plural of Chav?), then how would they react if you insinuated their Mums worked for cash down the harbour Crusoe? It's no' like the old days eh? Besides, you can't be a fully fledged Chav if you havent got a car to stick big bodykits onto Before anyone flies off the handle & starts crying onto their luis vitton 'genuine' baggage, I'm only bloody teasing!

HAHAHA! Didn't thing my wee post would get this reaction Was only kidding with the chav jibe dudes, jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez Yunguns nowadays, get wound up way too easily!

Aaaawwwww coooooooooooooooooooooool CHEERS!!!!! Goodbye evening, I'm off for a nosy Oh when the club wasnt full of complete chavs, heaven